We Could Have Been Bigger Than The Daleks
Ever since the Daleks became a worldwide smash around 50 years ago to the day both the BBC and the writers have been trying to find the next Daleks.
The next robot that would rake in a fortune with merchandise sales and have kids running around playgrounds pretending to be them.
Sadly nobody ever matched that popularity, but here are some of their attempts anyway.
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The Mechanoids
The Mechanoids only ever appeared in one story, 'The Chase' in June 1965 and even then they only ever appeared in the final episode. Written by Terry Nation, the writer that had created the Daleks he was looking to find a way of cashing in on another robot so for this story he created the Mechanoids.
Sadly their appearance in that story was overshadowed slightly by some of the other appearances in that story. Such as Queen Elizabeth I, Francis Bacon, William Shakespeare, Abraham Lincoln, Frankenstein, Dracula, The Empire State building, The Marie Celeste & The Beatles. As well as the Daleks.
The Mechanoids were from the planet Mechanus, were about twice the size of a Dalek, were spherical, covered in triangular segments topped off by what looks like buddhist prayer wheel. Instead of a sink plunger they had two rather pathetic looking arms that look like a couple of bits of bent metal tubing, mostly used for gesticulating wildly and hugging daleks, although they did have another arm with a disc on the end that would shoot out fire.
When they spoke they basically sounded like slowed down stoned Daleks meaning that the climactic battle with the Daleks at the end of the story had some of the clunkiest slowest dialogue for an 'exciting battle scene' I think I've ever seen.
The Mechanoids were given a slight chance to match the Daleks popularity, a handful of Mechanoid action figures were made in the 60s and they also appeared in some comic strips shortly after the episode aired but they never really took off in popularity. Also after this story aired Terry Nation never wrote for Doctor Who again until 1972's Day Of The Daleks after he spent several years in the United States trying to launch a Dalek TV Series. So I guess he gave up on the poor Mechanoids too.
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The Chumblies
The Chumblies were the robot servents of the reptile like Rills. The Rills were confined to their crashed spaceship due to them breathing ammonia instead of air so the Chumblies would scoot off onto the planet's surface and do the tasks that the Rill's were unable to do themselves.
Due to the BBC losing all 4 episodes of their one and only story 'Galaxy 4', originally broadcast in September 1965 the Chumblies bleeping & blooping on audio track was most Doctor Who fans only exposure to them. However in late 2011 Episode 3 turned up from a private film collector and the whole world got to see The Chumblies in all their crapness.
The Chumblies weren't actually named that by the Rills, the Doctor's companion Vicki names them that when she first sees them and once the Rill's translation devices start working they just go along with it.
The Chumblies don't actually do much other than follow you around, occasionally nudging you in the direction they want you to walk in. Basically they just follow you around bleeping like R2D2's retarded clingy younger brother.
When fame never came knocking and they were never used again they went on to form their own steam cleaning company to pay the bills
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The War Machines
Now the War Machines were impressive, or at least they were supposed to be anyway. Their only appearance happened during the story The War Machines in June of 1966.
The War Machines were the tool of the giant super computer Wotan, which stood for Will Operating Thought ANalogue which meant that it was a computer than can think for itself. Wotan was either pronounced 'wo-tan' or 'vo-tan' depending on whichever actor was saying it at the time.
The computer was the brainchild of one Professor Brett. Being a thinking computer Wotan decides that he doesn't need humans after all and so brainwashes a bunch of people to get them to build the War Machines. So
in a dingy warehouse in London an army of War Machines are built mostly by a bunch of 60s London spivs who wear flat caps & would say something like 'It's a fair cop, guv' if they ever got caught.
The War Machines had a gas jet thing just like the Daleks, but at well as they they had two massive mallet like crushing arms that could...... um menacingly knock over a pile of empty boxes and very little else.
They would make this whirring noise at you like every single computer you have ever seen with massive tape spools in any movie from back then.
Sadly all you needed to defeat them was a couple of skipping ropes and they would get confused, lose power and then they were done.
OK so it's electrical cable not skipping ropes, but the point still stands.
.........
The Quarks
The Quarks were the deadly (cough) robots used by The Dominators, a race of evil beings who liked to um, dominate, wear fancy outfits with giant shoulder pads and harass planets full of hippies.
The Quarks were devised by Mervyn Haisman and Henry Lincoln who had previously successfully created the Yeti as an iconic Doctor Who monster the year before. Unfortunately a walking giant rug that's roar is the sound of a slowed down flushing toilet isn't really marketable in the toy world unless you're George Lucas. So they created the Quarks for the story The Dominators in August 1968.
The Quarks problem was they were just not threatening, sure they had guns but because of their little legs you could probably outrun them by breaking into a gentle stroll. They also made extremely non threatening high pitched bleeping noises. In fact you can pretty much sum up the Quarks as being a toddler.
Whenever they were dispatched by The Dominators to do anything, they would just tend to wander around aimlessly occasionally firing at things and then run out of power after about 10 minutes, just like a toddler who's give you the runaround for a while and then fall asleep.
In fact this episode was so bad that the production team cut the number of episodes from 6 to 5 and wrote the ending themselves, which annoyed Haisman and Lincoln who asked for their name to be taken off the script. They were also pretty annoyed when they found out the BBC were going to bring out a load of Quark toys & merchandise without their knowledge. Needless to say the general public couldn't care less about the Quarks, the BBC never made a penny in merchandise sales, Haisman and Lincoln refused to work for Doctor Who ever again and so the Quarks were consigned to the dustbin of history.
..........
The Security Robot
Terry Nation is back, and this time he has his own series. After trying to flog the Daleks to the Americans & Hollywood (And failing) Terry Nation comes back to the BBC, writes a few Doctor Who scripts (Genesis Of The Daleks being the standout), then writes the hit series 'Survivors' about a plague wiping out most of the human life on Earth. Because of the success of these he is allowed to start his pet project. A TV show based on the movie the Dirty Dozen only set in space where a band of various criminals would battle against the corrupt Earth federation. It's name ... Blakes 7.
What Nation decided was that for this series to get the attention it warranted it needed something as big as the Daleks to make the series take off. With Blakes 7 being about criminals against a corrupt government it made race of robotic aliens that would destroy everything in it's path rather unworkable so he came up with the Security Robot.
The Security Robot would just hang around a few military bases defending them from intruders. It had a really powerful flamethrower, not like a short burst of flame but a real life flamethrower although not as powerful.The biggest problem with them was they made so much noise, you could probably hear one whirring towards you 10 minutes before it actually arrived meaning by the time it got there everybody had either hidden or legged it.
They appeared in a couple of early episodes of the series run but they were slow, cumbersome and a bit silly. When it was decided that having a couple of actors play guards it made the scenes so much easier to shoot and they were dropped for good.
........
The Cybermen
It took them a while to get it right but finally someone succeeded.
The Quarks were the deadly (cough) robots used by The Dominators, a race of evil beings who liked to um, dominate, wear fancy outfits with giant shoulder pads and harass planets full of hippies.
The Quarks were devised by Mervyn Haisman and Henry Lincoln who had previously successfully created the Yeti as an iconic Doctor Who monster the year before. Unfortunately a walking giant rug that's roar is the sound of a slowed down flushing toilet isn't really marketable in the toy world unless you're George Lucas. So they created the Quarks for the story The Dominators in August 1968.
The Quarks problem was they were just not threatening, sure they had guns but because of their little legs you could probably outrun them by breaking into a gentle stroll. They also made extremely non threatening high pitched bleeping noises. In fact you can pretty much sum up the Quarks as being a toddler.
Whenever they were dispatched by The Dominators to do anything, they would just tend to wander around aimlessly occasionally firing at things and then run out of power after about 10 minutes, just like a toddler who's give you the runaround for a while and then fall asleep.
In fact this episode was so bad that the production team cut the number of episodes from 6 to 5 and wrote the ending themselves, which annoyed Haisman and Lincoln who asked for their name to be taken off the script. They were also pretty annoyed when they found out the BBC were going to bring out a load of Quark toys & merchandise without their knowledge. Needless to say the general public couldn't care less about the Quarks, the BBC never made a penny in merchandise sales, Haisman and Lincoln refused to work for Doctor Who ever again and so the Quarks were consigned to the dustbin of history.
..........
The Security Robot
Terry Nation is back, and this time he has his own series. After trying to flog the Daleks to the Americans & Hollywood (And failing) Terry Nation comes back to the BBC, writes a few Doctor Who scripts (Genesis Of The Daleks being the standout), then writes the hit series 'Survivors' about a plague wiping out most of the human life on Earth. Because of the success of these he is allowed to start his pet project. A TV show based on the movie the Dirty Dozen only set in space where a band of various criminals would battle against the corrupt Earth federation. It's name ... Blakes 7.
What Nation decided was that for this series to get the attention it warranted it needed something as big as the Daleks to make the series take off. With Blakes 7 being about criminals against a corrupt government it made race of robotic aliens that would destroy everything in it's path rather unworkable so he came up with the Security Robot.
The Security Robot would just hang around a few military bases defending them from intruders. It had a really powerful flamethrower, not like a short burst of flame but a real life flamethrower although not as powerful.The biggest problem with them was they made so much noise, you could probably hear one whirring towards you 10 minutes before it actually arrived meaning by the time it got there everybody had either hidden or legged it.
They appeared in a couple of early episodes of the series run but they were slow, cumbersome and a bit silly. When it was decided that having a couple of actors play guards it made the scenes so much easier to shoot and they were dropped for good.
........
The Cybermen
It took them a while to get it right but finally someone succeeded.
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